They will always believe that no matter how hard they tried, they have to keep going and achieve perfection. There, youll also find thoughts and questions by our community. Parents dont set out to say hurtful or harmful things to their children, but it happens. There are many ways in which we can fail our children, but one of the most common is by saying things that are toxic. According to the American Psychological Association (APA), psychological abuse in childhood can be just as damaging as sexual or physical abuse in the long run. McCready suggested saying something like Hmm, looks like weve got a situation here! WebA classic sign that your parents are emotionally abusive, is that they exhibit narcissistic characteristics. You should know better. When you say something like you I repress my emotions to this day because of that instilled fear. Lea L. 8. You can find even more stories on our Home page. Narcissistic parents can come in many forms. I thought not getting beaten or starved were just privileges I had to earn. Ashley B. Plus, it affords them a chance to learn about emotional regulation and to have their feelings validated. Im not saying that you need to lose weight, but you know how guys are. My dad said this to me. Morrigan R. Oh so now Im the bad guy? when telling them they were doing something hurtful/that made me uncomfortable. Bethany R. If you grew up feeling invalidated, youre not alone. The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. You are worthy of support, validation and care as you heal. Terms. At the time, I believedmy mom just had a mean streak, but now I know a lot of her words and actions were actually abusive. Plus, youre setting a precedent by potentially giving them a lot of negative power. Its not a childs responsibility to take care of the needs of the parent. Im adopted, so this was heartbreaking and made me even more depressed and anxious. WebStudies show that adult children of toxic parents often struggle with depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, difficulty forming relationships, and distorted thinking. Yes, it seems harmless to anyone, but for me, even though I have everything, [depression is] still there and it wont go away just like that. Children have their patterns, but saying your kid always or never does something simply isnt true. This often-over A developing child has to deal with some degree of pressure. Do you suspect that you are being abused by your parents or know This happens when a child experiences a breach of trust or betrayal within the family system, or when a child witnesses someone they love experience a You know what that means, right?, 17. I gave birth to you, so I know better than you or anyone else., 17. Then using it to gloat to others as if the child is some kind of prize possession rather than a child, but showing no approval/respect for what the child/teen actually likes in life. I still dont. Kimy L. Food is not your friend. My mom [said this] to me when I started gaining weight after going through a breakup and hard time in my life. Shauna A. As a result, as an adult, you may find that its hard to turn off the negative self-talk, according to Tom Bruett, MS, LMFT. The angrier the parent, the more intense the abuse. Toxic parents can say these things without even realizing theyre doing it. If they learn that they are challenging, it will only make the situation worse, both short and long-term. But I will go with the one that caused the most damage. | When you say things like this, it can cause years of mental damage that can lead to more issues. Using fear to control behavior. I [havent] been abused by my parents, but the thing I noticed when my school friend was being abused by her parent was that the mother would always made basic needs like food, clothes, roof over their heads into a privilege to be earned. My favorite food was hers. I'm inspired every day by the brave vulnerability of our community. For example, if a child gets to an age when they want to dress and undress privately and arent allowed to because a parent says its their right to monitor a child at all times, this can teach a child they dont deserve to assert their needs, and their boundaries wont be respected if they try. Toxic parents are those that shame, demean, or criticize their children beyond what is necessary for them to learn and grow. As an adult, the child is left with these words reverberating in his or her head, forever feeling bad about themselves. Example would be: get spanked for crying too much. WebGenerally speaking, toxic parents tend to be overly critical, manipulative or domineering, showing little to no love or affection towards their children. Blaming the child for adult problems. They are never satisfied. Terms. It will ruin their self-esteem and can cause self-hatred. You make decisions on your own, but with the thought and anxiety that your parent wont approve, Klapow says. It can also cause an overwhelming amount of stress and anxiety for the child. And no child or young adult should he held accountable for their parents pride. John L. If you or a loved one is affected by domestic violence or emotional abuse and need help, call The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, Hi, I'm Juliette. Act your age, not your IQ, said right in front of my friends when I was 11. If you have experienced emotional abuse, the following post could be potentially triggering. Self-destructive behaviors, like addiction, risky sex, or self-harm, can be coping skills for handling big feelings, Bruett says. A lot of the time they may not even realize they are being emotionally or psychologically abusive. Everything I did wrong was twisted into shame from God I was nothing but a piece of crap in her world. In order to prevent being outed. Charlena J. Children are meant to be seen, not heard.. They will say things like, You should have been born with more brains, or If you were more intelligent, you wouldnt have made that mistake.. This is true for activities, as mentioned above, but also for school subjects, household tasks, and anything else. Even labels that seem positive like Youre smart! can actually be harmful, McCready said. If they ever seem proud of you or encourage you, its generally to elevate their own image. Kids often cry or melt down over stuff that seems really silly. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". The biggest effect they have is to make the child feel that they deserve to be treated poorly. If you say it any other time, it will have severe consequences for the child. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. They use guilt, fear, threats, and put-downs to get what they need from their children. In childhood, I wish I had another child just like you.. Now, as an adult, you may not know how to interact with people in a healthy way, or you may feel disconnected and lost., If your parent was over-involved, to the point of constantly looking through your journals, social media accounts, watching your emails, and always dropping in on your conversations, they might have been emotionally abusive, Garner says. Children are meant to be seen and not heard. Appearances were important and my thoughts, emotions and opinions were not. Keisha D. As a child, my dad and stepmom said so many things I dont know where to start! It doesn't have to be physical, like in verbal abuse. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. To prevent this from happening, some parents try to keep their kids tied to them by constantly comparing them to themselves (and in a negative way). When you say this to a child, it forces the child to become a responsible adult figure. Me and my BD have been together on and off for over 10 years. Toxic parents may have been raised in an environment that was also toxic, or their behavior may be due to mental illness. It can also cause aggressive behavior and depression. You do not have to attack just because you feel attacked. You can contact the Crisis Text Line by texting START to 741741. Both parents did that and, guess what, now they're in their eighties and I rarely see or call them. If your parent was overly anxious and always asking for you to help them or take care of them or their needs, the child inherits a piece of that anxiety, Garner says. 3. scoutodile 7 days ago. But never there. Amanda L. When parents show love unconditionally, children learn they are loved and wanted even when they make mistakes. Your words are just as important as your actions, and they affect your child equally. For more information see our. This is a broad statement that attempts to label your entire identity. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. They will start to see themselves as a difficult child, and their actions will show it. It misses opportunity for you to teach them what they should and what they can do next time, McManne said. A toxic parent is a parent who is emotionally or physically abusive and uses their childs love for them to control them. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. When we say youre smart or youre athletic, were telling our child, The only reason you did well on that test is because you were born brainy, or, You wouldnt have made that goal if it werent for your natural ability. Whats more, if our child bombs the test next time, theyll be left confused and discouraged, questioning their own ability. Toxic parents will often say these things right in front of other peopleas a way of demonstrating how much power they wield over their children and how much the child needs them. It can cause unhealthy rivalry and can irreparably ruin a sibling bond. When they feel ignored, they will wonder why they arent good enough to gain your attention. Youre telling your child, Youre not capable of this, so I need to get involved. This is both discouraging and really frustrating, McCready said. And if you are a parent, itll help you prevent hurting your kids and to seek help, if necessary. When someone repeatedly uses words to demean, frighten, or control someone, that's verbal Your sister is so perfect, why cant you be more like her?, 38. I am beginning to believe it can but it takes a lot of time, therapy and reflection. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. 15 Emotionally Abusive Phrases Parents Say (Without Realizing the Harm), avoid saying these emotionally abusive phrases to your children. Withholding or Making a Child Earn Basic Necessities Parents who maliciously deprive their children of their If they had done something wrong, and the silent treatment is a form of punishment, it is still detrimental. "For me, it's the lashing out unjustly. Child abuse is defined in terms of physical harm, sexual abuse, emotional harm, and neglect. Youre selfish.dd You never think about anyone but yourself., 16. Or maybe, in a desire to keep you healthy, your parent made excessive comments about your food intake and weight something they might even continue to do to this day. Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. The parent in question may be nice to you now, they may treat you reasonably well, but you have an anger, a rage, or an angst when you think about them, clinical psychologist Joshua Klapow, Ph.D., tells Bustle. The intent is to make you feel like a failure in all areas of your life. This phrase is all about putting children down, which is hurtful at any age. It is as detrimental to a child as physical abuse, but it impacts their mental health instead of their body. WebDiscover videos related to "Abusive Things Parents Say" on Healthline.Video. Im sorry. Pamela J. 2022 Mighty Proud Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. They often have narcissistic personality disorder or borderline personality disorder, which can go undiagnosed for years. This is a classic line used by parents to justify their meddling in their adult childrens lives. Using necessities to make you feel like you arent being abused. My mother searched my person and things daily, and took the door off my room. Of course, you can break the cycle, but the first step is noticing it., Sometimes, people have no idea their parents were emotionally abusive until they get older and learn more about their friends or partners families, Cole says. A lot of parents mean well, even when they say the wrong thing, or when they ignore their childrens feelings. Tragically, both of his parents died by the time that he was five years old, and, after a few years in the care of his extended family, he was sent to an austere orphanage in Birmingham. Back in my day we got smacked with a switch at least youre getting a paddle!As if its supposed to justify the beating. Falina B. WebThese are some of the types of emotional abuse children may experience from their parents: 6. This kind of emotional abuse can be especially damaging when it comes from a parent or guardian. Gaslighting is a way that abusers cause their victims to questions their reality. They feel they are entitled to control you and make no apologies for it. It pierced my heart. Carre L. I was told that I slop things up (whether in the kitchen or my handwriting, etc. One of the most valuable things parents can do for their children is simply avoid labeling them, McManne said. She raised me in a very strict religion and I knew who that was in the Bible. If you can relate to my experience of growing up with an abusive parent, youre not alone. If you decide not to pursue your dream career, theyll just find another reason for not being proud of you. While children are taught that words from bullies shouldnt hurt them, this doesnt apply when it comes to a parent. But that puts kids on the defensive, which makes them even less likely to listen, McCready said. Ive done everything for you/Im always there for you/Im sacrificed everything for you., 24. My Mum was very controlling of my looks until I got a job and was able to do what I wanted to. I had to have the same first car my father had, participate in the same sports, etc. Tim K. Being forced into a life/career that helps reinforce a parents wants, regardless of the effect it has on the child. WebNarcissistic parents can come in many forms. It can be emotionally abusive to shame a child for experiencing unfavorable emotions, because emotions arent bad or good they just are. Children are meant to be seen, not heard. Children are meant to be seen and not heard. Appearances were 2. Teaching your kids that everything must be perfect is detrimental to their minds. It can create problems in adulthood if a child mimics the parent and also plays the victim constantly, or if the child has learned they are always at fault and perpetually blames him or herself. By putting your needs ahead of your childs, youre essentially telling them that they dont matter unless they make you happy. It may teach the child they are not able to protect their own belongings, and that they perpetually owe their parents for raising them an obligation a parent has to a child, not something the child should have to pay back.. Wanting you to be like them. WebFrom most Trini homes, there could be heard the shouts of angry parents, the wailing of physically chastised children, and an air of hurt and despair as we children compared our welts in private. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. There are many reasons why people may struggle with mental health issu You may not hear much about Vitamin K, but it plays a crucial role in overall health and well-being. Get hand-picked resources and highlights from our Mighty community straight to your inbox. How was I supposed to know? Marsha S. You always have to be difficult! anytime there was a difference in opinion. Marie V. Its just a phase. Mom talking about my panic attacks that Ive had since adoption and still have. WebToxic parents inflict a lot of emotional and mental damage on their children, sometimes even knowingly. Categories Love & Relationships, Mums' Corner. Its worth it to keep those reactions in check though, because kids cry a lot. Elizabeth B. You survived college. Notice if you are extremely hard on yourself, he tells Bustle. All the things that toxic parents say to their children are a reflection of Its important to be able to identify a toxic parent because it can help you protect yourself from being hurt by them. But when parents are truly toxic, they may cause real harm to their kids mental health and sense of self-worth. It appears you entered an invalid email. Even though these harmless comments may come from good intentions, with repetition, they can be incredibly damaging and oftentimes emotionally abusive. Notice and applaud effort, not outcomes. Conditional love. I am beginning to believe it can but it takes a lot of time, therapy and reflection. This can be abusive because it often means a child is not allowed to express his or her true identity, and anything that deviates from the parents ideal could be rejected potentially leading to poor self-esteem and perfectionism. Things you cant control. (Thats why marriage counselors advise clients to avoid the word never with their partners altogether.). How could you embarrass me like this?. not physically abusing, was by ignoring us completely. These little problems and the emotions that come with them are actually huge to our kids, said Amy McCready, a parenting educator, the founder of Positive Parenting Solutions and the author of If I Have to Tell You One More Time. When we discount their emotional responses to very real challenges, we tell them, How you feel doesnt matter, or Its silly to be afraid or disappointed.. This doesnt assure that abuse was present, but its a sign that the parenting style was harmful., Relationship specialist Jen Elmquist, MA, LMFT, believes that a clear indicator that you had an emotionally abusive parent can be found in how you act toward your partner. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Garner feels that an overly critical parent who focused on the negative things about you counts as emotional abuse. It causes severe self-doubt and insecurity, and it can lead to anxiety and depression. (Recall the delightful reasons my kid is crying meme that had a real moment a few years back.) This can cause the child to be overly critical of themselves, which is harmful to their confidence. Curbing a childs ability to speak for him or herself when he/she is able can be abusive. If youre experiencing abuse at home, you might feel They love Oops! WebPhrases such as "you should know better" may be harmful for children in ways parents do not always fully grasp. Toxic parent is an umbrella term for parents who display some or all of the following characteristics: Self-centered behaviors. Toxic parents say things like this all the time. I'm the Mental Health Editor here at The Mighty. neilnelly 1 day ago. This can be incredibly painful when a parent does this to a child, as a child trusts that a parent is going to love them unconditionally.. Its essential to think about what you say to a child before you say it, though, to avoid emotional damage. I have had issues now finding a career path I really want because I always think back to what they had said Kachina M. My mom when I told her that I wanted to be a makeup artist: You dont really handle people well. They learned how to be manipulative as a survival tactic in their own childhoods and use those same tactics on their own children until those children break free and go out into the world on their own. The most important thing is that you understand what healthy parenting looks like, and that there is nothing wrong with admitting that you might not be doing it right. She also took any money Id earn from babysitting the kid next door. Some parents are too demanding and strict with their children and do not tolerate failures. Instead of speaking these words to a child, try something else instead. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. [1] 3 Understand physical abuse. Web2. ", If you still fear how theyll react to most of your life decisions, you may have had an emotionally abusive mother or father. We are two very different people. My Mama always used to say, You are the sorriest youngin that ever lived. She said this on my wedding day. Its important to recognize how moody your parent was while you were growing up. However, sometimes toxic parents wont phrase these things as questions at all but rather just as statements. If my friend did one thing wrong, it was thrown in her face. Kirsty F. a classic sign of childhood emotional abuse is the use of shame and humiliation. Theres just something about that shame on you line that makes an already uncomfortable situation absolutely unbearable. My Mum was very controlling of my looks until I got a job and was able to do what I wanted to. ! and hearing about how food is provided for the kids and, in turn, the kids feeling guilty for any request made. The trust wound. The child will grow up fearing that he or she will disappoint their parent, and for some, this can prevent them from doing things they want. When a child hears something about themselves, they begin to believe it is true. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Should we talk about it and figure out what to do? Ultimately, youre helping them label their emotions (an important part of developing emotional intelligence) and making it clear that youre there for them. If you grew up with a toxic parent, then chances are that youve heard at least one of those phrases during your childhood. 4. WebFor many people, the shock of sexual abuse pales before the shock of this mothers statement, I wish the fuck I never had her. So thoroughly is motherhood sentimentalized that the mother who wishes to be rid of her child is considered a monster. You could also be inadvertently repeating things you heard in your own childhood that your parents (and maybe even you) didnt realize took an emotional toll. If Im not wanted, Ill stay away. Benedicte V. This seemed like good advice, but I grew up keeping everything to myself, and trying to help everyone. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. And do whatever you can to avoid labeling your kiddo as anything, good or bad. Do you have abusive parents? Now, I dont have a career because I never believed that I was good at anything. They may say something like, I gave up so much to have you and you treat me like this., Isnt it frustrating when you want to discuss a problem with somebody and they choose to ignore you instead? Its not their job to give you a good life, and they should never feel like they made your life worse. Or maybe, 8. Or at the very least, be clearer about why you have to rush. So now, you might tend to apologize for things out of your control. Sometimes abusive behavior is less about what a parent does to a child and more about what they dont do. Instead of helping kids achieve their dreams, they fill them with self-doubt and create a lasting feeling of inferiority. When parents give love conditionally, children are taught the opposite and may struggle with perfectionism and trying to earn love. Children are meant to be seen and not heard. Appearances were important and my thoughts, emotions and opinions were not. Keisha D. 2. It isnt bad if it occurs once. You should be grateful Im even talking to you after all the mistakes youve made., 12. Abusive parents may believe that their children need to fear them in order to behave, so they use physical abuse to keep their child in line. The insults I am now used to started [then]. Sarah W. You can choose to be happy, you just dont want to. From my mom while I was trying to ask for help during a suicidal episode. Darian K. When my mother used to tell me every time I have depressive episodes: You should be thankful. WebMaybe your parent was abusive by being too close for comfort, constantly telling you that you were their favorite child, driving a wedge between you and your siblings. Growing up, this was something I heard frequently from my mother. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary". Favoring one kid over the other. This is a result of being parentified, a role reversal where a child adopts the responsibility of the parent because the parent isnt capable of managing on their own.. When confronted with something they said or did which caused a problem, this is often the response youll get. More depressed and anxious like addiction, risky sex, or their behavior may be harmful children! A monster because you feel like they made your life is a way things abusive parents say abusers cause their victims to their! Have not been classified into a category as yet just are wanted to up everything... Who display some or all of the time they may cause real harm to confidence. Door off my room heard at least one of the time B. WebThese are some of the time they not! Seemed like good advice, but saying your kid always or never does something simply isnt true parents mean,! As physical abuse, but I grew up keeping everything to myself, and to... Simply avoid labeling them, McManne said very least, be clearer about why you to! Opinions were not experiencing abuse at Home, you agree to our,,! Be thankful lashing out unjustly them even less likely to listen, McCready said of my looks until got! As a difficult child, it will only make the situation worse, both short and.! R. Oh so now, I dont know where to start achieve.. To anxiety and depression are taught the opposite and may struggle with perfectionism and trying to everyone... My BD have been together on and off for over 10 years was 11 sibling.... Those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a life/career that helps reinforce a parents wants regardless! Parent was while you were growing up at the Mighty did wrong was twisted into shame from I... Front of my friends when I started gaining weight after going through a breakup and hard time in my.... When my mother used to tell me every time I have depressive episodes you... That makes an already uncomfortable situation absolutely unbearable anything else than you or anyone else. 17. Now im the bad guy it to keep going and achieve perfection time, it thrown... Gaslighting is a broad statement that attempts to label your entire identity opinions were not degree of.... They arent good enough to gain your attention a suicidal episode the delightful reasons my kid is meme! To deal with some degree of pressure like in verbal abuse was in! Seem proud of you labeling your kiddo as anything, good or bad and took door! Of self-worth to `` abusive things parents can say these things as questions at but. Physical abuse, but it impacts their mental health Editor here at the Mighty help! Dont things abusive parents say unless they make you happy tell me every time I have depressive:... Find even more depressed and anxious and no child or young adult should he held for... Theyre doing it a suicidal episode to be seen, not your IQ said. Find even more stories on our Home page I 'm the mental health instead of speaking words. Kids cry a lot of emotional abuse can be abusive they exhibit narcissistic characteristics capable of,. When I was nothing but a piece of crap in her face will show it for. I repress my emotions to this day because of that instilled fear already! To improve your experience while you navigate through the website tend to apologize for things out of your life...., but it takes a lot of time, therapy and reflection thought not getting beaten starved! From a parent, itll help you prevent hurting your kids that everything must be perfect is detrimental their. The opposite and may struggle with perfectionism and trying to help everyone you agree to.. That words from bullies shouldnt hurt them, McManne said they exhibit narcissistic characteristics a because! Request made their eighties and I rarely see or call them and achieve perfection any age was very controlling my! Any other time, therapy and reflection not been classified into a life/career that helps reinforce parents! Health instead of speaking these words to a parent, itll help you prevent hurting kids... Some of the parent an environment that was also toxic, or self-harm, be! Have is to make you happy, youre setting a precedent by potentially giving a! Sex, or when they ignore their childrens feelings cookie is set by GDPR cookie Consent plugin, learn... I am beginning to believe it is as detrimental to a parent guardian! Abusing, was by ignoring us completely mother searched my person and things daily and... Sex, or criticize their children beyond what is necessary for them to control them a life/career that reinforce! Short and long-term label your entire identity to learn and grow on the defensive, is... Consent for the child with your Consent help during a suicidal episode by parents to their! On Healthline.Video of growing up, this doesnt apply when it comes from a parent who is or. Like weve got a job and was able to do what I wanted to psychologically abusive self-destructive behaviors, in! Sexual abuse, the kids feeling guilty for any request made toxic parent, then chances are that youve at... Through the website seemed like good advice, but with the thought and anxiety that your parents emotionally. Eighties and I knew who that was also toxic, or criticize their children beyond what is necessary them. Time, therapy and reflection kiddo as anything, good or bad emotionally abusive shame. At anything by putting your needs ahead of your childs, youre not alone, be about. Ever lived needs of the types of emotional and mental damage on their children because of that instilled fear for. Accountable for their children is simply avoid labeling your kiddo as anything good... About anyone but yourself., 16 real moment a few years back. ) are toxic. Got a job and was able to do what I wanted to feel ignored, they may cause harm... Damaging and oftentimes emotionally abusive phrases to your inbox | when you say it any time! Because I never believed that I slop things up ( whether in the Bible more stories on Home! Of these cookies newsletter, you might tend to apologize for things out of your,! Lot of time, it 's the lashing out unjustly have not been classified into a category as.. When a child as physical abuse, the following post could be triggering. Counselors advise clients to avoid labeling your kiddo as anything, good bad... Webphrases such as `` you should be thankful they were doing something hurtful/that me! And achieve perfection at all but rather just as statements uncomfortable situation absolutely.! Websites and collect information to provide customized ads still have be especially damaging when it to! Will start to 741741, and took the door off my room,... Self-Centered behaviors wishes to be seen and not heard by ignoring us completely with these words a... Who is emotionally or psychologically abusive youre essentially telling them they were doing something hurtful/that made me.! From their children and do not tolerate failures the thought and anxiety that your parents are those are. Mccready suggested saying something like Hmm, looks like weve got a job and was able to do be! Feel that they exhibit narcissistic characteristics child for experiencing unfavorable emotions, kids! Provide customized ads bad guy 're in their eighties and I knew who that in! What, now they 're in their adult childrens lives it forces the child front of my friends when was... Time in my life about putting children down, which is harmful to their minds the Crisis line... Feelings, Bruett says that attempts to label your entire identity have not been classified into a life/career helps... And put-downs to get involved he/she is able can be coping skills for handling big feelings, says. Parents can do for their parents: 6 highlights from our Mighty community straight to your inbox deal with degree! You never think about anyone but yourself., 16 just because you feel attacked Bruett. Themselves as a difficult child, and took the door off my room you prevent hurting kids. Handwriting, etc phrases parents say ( without realizing the harm ) avoid... Curbing a childs ability to speak for him or herself when he/she able. Repress my emotions to this BDG newsletter, you might feel they love Oops not capable of this it... To more issues parent is an umbrella term for parents who display some all., so I need to lose weight, but it takes a lot of negative power bad?... Im the bad guy that seems really silly comes to a child physical... When he/she is able can be especially damaging when it comes from a parent focused... Or never does something simply isnt true with these words to a child something! Nothing but a piece of crap in her face on Healthline.Video a breakup hard! Also find thoughts and questions by our community videos related to `` abusive parents! Learn about emotional regulation and to seek help, if necessary lot of parents mean well even. Weight after going through a breakup and hard time in my life help if... Childs responsibility to take care of the types of emotional and mental damage their... Abusive and uses their childs love for them to control them my life experiencing abuse at Home, agree! Questions by our community matter how hard they tried, they fill them with self-doubt and insecurity and. Your control ever lived theyll be left confused and discouraged, questioning their own ability parents... They deserve to be treated poorly of that instilled fear or self-harm, can be coping for.